If it’s Not an Absolute Yes It’s a No

Stop struggling with whether or not to agree to do something. If it is not an absolute “Yes”, consider the answer to be a “No.” Your hesitation indicates something does not fit right for you.

Maybe it will another time, but not currently. If your struggle whether or not to accept has all sorts of “ifs” and “buts” attached, say “No.”

This speeds up the decision making process. Often an answer can be given right on the spot, instead of delaying for hours or days. Be sure of your highest priorities and the decision will be easier to make. Either it fits or it doesn’t.

“Responding immediately is attractive because it is still very rare even though it seems so obvious. It is so rare because most people procrastinate. In fact, you may need to upgrade systems, streamline, and change your whole manner of responding to people in order to provide an immediate response.”

Talane Miedaner, Coach Yourself to Success

Five Days of Action

How are you at saying “no” to requests that are made of you? Are you feeling pressure from too many commitments? Think about how you generally process requests from others in your mind. What’s your default method of responding? How well do your answers reflect your own standards and boundaries?

Today practice “If it’s not an absolute yes, it’s a no” thinking. Don’t worry. You can still be kind and generous. You can say “no” and people will understand. If they don’t, then they might have been using you for reasons that have gone unspoken.

Notice the ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’ and low level grumbling that comes out of your mouth around responsibilities you have agreed to take on. Be conscious of changing your attitude. If you agreed to it, do it with style. Be positive.

Practice no delay responding. Either it’s for you or it isn’t. Be clear. Be kind. Be cool with it afterwards

It’s important to know so well what you will say “yes” to, that saying “no” becomes easy. Make a list of those requests that get a positive response from you. Memorize it or keep it handy so that you can refer to it when needed.